As our kids grow, we allow and get them involved in many different activities. We want them to find their niche; a place where they feel comfortable and feel like they belong. We become chauffeurs and our lives revolve around transporting from one place to another. Sometimes we urge our children to go in the directions we went. Sometimes we push too hard. We justify our feelings of stress by telling ourselves that it is for their benefit. We want our children to be active, to be diverse, to express all of their interests. We keep telling ourselves that we do it for our kids.
As they enter middle school, we spend small fortunes sending them to summer camps, sports camps or specialty camps. We want them to experience diversity and hone their skills. At some point, you must ask yourself – is this too much? Are you spending more money on gas to and from activities than you are making each payday? Are you the drill sergeant saying, “OK you have 10 minutes to eat and get ready for basketball, but make sure you bring your shoes for dance class. You have dance after basketball and did you get your homework done after school?” If you are spending more time running down the timeline for after school, then it might be time to scale back. The biggest sign that our kids are over scheduled and stressed is when they start to snap back at you. Sometimes, it is simply pre-teen and teen moods. You know when it is “normal” behavior and when it’s not.
Become an activity vigilante; know when to say when! Your kids may be angry for several minutes, maybe a day or two, but they WILL get over it. Everyone will be able to relax and enjoy each other again.
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